What it Means to be an Advocate and a Survivor

As unfortunate as it is, it is not uncommon to be a survivor of violence in the USA. It's no different for advocates working in the SV/DV field. We know from our 2022/23 Roadmap to Advocate Wellness Survey that 61% of the advocates, who participated, also identified as survivors of domestic or sexual violence. Advocates who are also survivors often join the anti-violence movement because of their lived experiences. Advocates have shared that because of their experiences, they can easily empathize with their clients, and know what they're feeling. We want to share a few stories with you directly from the RAFT team, advocate responses to our Roadmap to Advocate Wellness Survey, and other advocates about what it means to be both an advocate and a survivor.

Advocate-Survivors hope to be the advocate that they needed in tough times.

"Being a survivor, I’ve always wanted to give back to a cause that would inspire others to heal and become who they’ve always wanted to be if they hadn’t suffered from trauma. ~Advocate D"

"I grew up in small town USA, where sexual and domestic violence isn’t acknowledged or talked about. I wasn’t educated on prevention, even worse there wasn’t a support system in place for me after I was raped. I spent years feeling shame and believing it was my fault.

Working for RAFT has been both eye-opening and healing. While every story I hear is heartbreaking -- I grieve with the survivors who have had a sense of innocence ripped away from them. But through this work, I’ve learned that I was never alone, and now, I have the privilege of being the support I once needed—reminding others that they are not alone either.

It's easy to become jaded in a world that can be so ugly.. but advocacy continually brings me hope. Being surrounded by fellow advocates reminds me there is always light after dark." - MB, RAFT Team member

"I value that I bring a unique perspective because of my experience as a survivor. I didn't learn how to do this work because I read and studied it, I lived it, and now I have a passion to make sure others don't go through what I did. I approach my work in a way that makes my days worthwhile, and I value the fact that community members are aware of the resources we have, and how we can help if they experience violence." - RAW Survey Participant

Advocate-Survivors are passionate and dedicated to the work they do.

"Every time I see a victim come to me and at first they are so scared just like I once was when all what happened to me. But after awhile and giving them support and hope and show them that they have a lot more in them then they think. Afterwords just seeing the strength within them!" - RAW Survey Participant

"I feel like I am a caring person and a knowledgeable person with regard to DV. I have had experience with domestic violence in my own marriage. I feel like I brought some thing to the table with this job from past experience with domestic violence. It’s easier to care for someone else when you’ve been there and had these things happened to you yourself." - RAW Survey Participant

"When I was a teenager, I didn't have a support system, I didn't understand that what was happening to me was wrong and that I shouldn't be treated that way by a boyfriend. After years of enduring abuse, I moved away to attend college, and I ended the relationship. I told him to never contact me or my family again. Thankfully, he complied, but it took me over a decade to heal and get the help I needed after ending the relationship.

Knowing that advocates are supporting survivors everyday, and doing everything they can to prevent violence, gives me hope that more young women won't have to endure the same violence that I did.

As part of the RAFT team, I don't always think of myself as a capital-A "Advocate", but I'm learning more and more that direct service is not the only way to be an advocate. Being able to support advocates through my work has brought so much meaning to my life, and I am so grateful to be involved in this movement." - SS, RAFT Team member

Advocate-Survivors are extremely empathetic and can relate to their clients on a different level.

"Well I have sympathy and empathy because I know where they are coming from. I grew up in a domestic violence home. I know that helpless feeling. That is why I go above and beyond to help my clients and let them know I will be there for them no matter what." - RAW Survey Participant

"Just being a survivor of DV & rape. I’ve been in those situations and I know how the victims feel." - RAW Survey Participant

"Whatever you try, remember that to be an advocate, it takes a lot of courage, support, respect, empathy, and gratitude. Advocating can also involve research, work, preparation, and professionalism, so we must remember self-care. We survivors own our truths and just because we told our truth yesterday doesn’t mean that we owe it to anyone to tell our truth today." - Michelle Kuiper

Advocate-Survivors are courageous, strong and resilient, but that doesn't mean they don't need mental health support at work.

"The most challenging part is learning how to protect your emotional health while supporting a victim, especially when their stories have similarities to your own. Vicarious trauma doesn’t have a flashing warning signal to let you know when it is happening, so we have to protect our emotional health while on the clock. That’s a true challenge." ~Advocate C

"Vicarious trauma is a very real byproduct of advocating for victims of sexual violence, even more so when we identify with the victim. When our personal stories align with a victim’s, we need to make time for our own self-care so as to not cause more trauma for ourselves. I think the hardest part of the job is protecting ourselves while also supporting the victim in their time of need." ~Advocate D

"The transformation from victim, to survivor, to advocate is a personal journey of empowerment and resilience. It's about acknowledging our painful past while using it as a springboard for positive change. We make the conscious choice to rise above our adversities, to advocate for ourselves and others, and to shine a light on the path for those who follow in our footsteps. No matter where you are on this journey, remember, each step you take is a testament of your strength, courage, and indomitable spirit." - Joey Davis

“Some say overcomer or thriver. I like those words too. But for me, I choose the word survivor. To engage in the continuous life-long healing process in the aftermath of something traumatic, painful and, at some point, shameful… that’s what being a survivor means to me.” – Leticia Manzano, HAWC Sexual Assault Services Senior Manager and Survivor

If you are an Advocate-Survivor...

Join our Advocate-Survivor Support Group call every third Wednesday of the month at 3 pm PT / 4 pm MT / 5 pm CT / 6 pm ET. You can register for the call here: https://us06web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tZUtde-rrzotGdaTYzPfCrDsqGlXYUuGuJjg

For a full schedule of our monthly support calls for 2025, download our 2025 support call calendar here: